Courage the Cowardly Dog
Courage the Cowardly Dog

This article is a transcript of the Courage the Cowardly Dog episode "King Ramses' Curse" from season , which aired on January 21, 2000.

This transcript is

This article is a transcript of the Courage the Cowardly Dog episode "King Ramses' Curse" from season 1, which aired on January 21, 2000.

  • (It is nighttime in Nowhere. A silver car speeds down the road, driven by a pair of literal cat burglars. The feline thieves' car is being followed by a police helicopter.)
  • Grave Robber 1: Faster! Drive faster! (shakes the driver) If they catch us with it, we are done for!
  • (Grave Robber 2 slaps away his partner's hand and slams on the brakes. The car screeches to a halt near a wooden water pump on the Bagge Farm.)
  • Grave Robber 1: What are you doing?!
  • (The robbers exit the car and open the trunk. The object inside glows.)
  • Grave Robber 2: You're right. We've got to hide the thing where we can find it later. There! (points to the pump) The water pump.
  • (The police chopper is closing in. Its searchlight sweeps back and forth across the road, seeking the thieves. The thieves bury their loot: a large stone slab, yellow with age. As they fill the hole in, the chopper draws closer still. The thieves hurry back to their getaway vehicle.)
  • Grave Robber 2: We'll come back for it when the heats off.
  • Grave Robber 1: (buckling his seat belt) And we'll be rich!
  • Grave Robber 2: (looking down the road) Hey! What happened to the road?
  • (An ominous fog has suddenly rolled in. The thieves' car is approached by a person. We can't see this person, but we can see their shadow on the hood of the car. The thieves look shocked.)
  • King Ramses: Return the slab or suffer my curse.
  • Grave Robber 1: Curse?
  • Grave Robber 2: What curse?
  • (A buzzing noise is heard as a massive black cloud approaches them. It is a swarm of locusts. The thieves scream as the locusts cover their car. The sounds of buzzing and metal grinding are heard as the camera pans over to show the Bagge Farmhouse. After a few seconds the sounds stop, and the camera pans back over to the road. The locusts are gone, and they have consumed the thieves and their car. Only tire skid marks remain on the street as the police chopper passes by, still searching for the grave robbers.
  • At the farm, Courage is looking out the window.)
  • Courage: What's going on out there?
  • (The next day, Courage digs up is outside. He is next to the water pump, standing on the recently disturbed dirt. He starts digging and unearths the stone slab. On the front of the slab are 4 images: King Ramses, water waves, a phonograph, and a locust.)
  • Courage: Huh?
  • (Inside the house, Muriel and Eustace are relaxing in their chairs. Eustace reads his newspaper. There is a knock at the door and Muriel gets up to answer. She opens the door and it's Courage. He is carrying the slab in his mouth.)
  • Muriel: Why, what's this now? (She takes the slab from Courage's mouth) Oh, my. This looks very old. Eustace!
  • Eustace: Heh?
  • Muriel: Come look what Courage found. (brushes some dust away from the slab) What do you suppose it could be? (presents the slab to Eustace)
  • Eustace: (grabs the slab and inspects it) Well, judging by the markings and the obvious age of the relic, I'd have to say it would be... garbage! (throws the slab out the open window)
  • Muriel: Eustace!
  • (Courage runs over to the window and peers out at the discarded slab. Eustace turns on the tv.)
  • Eustace: Garbage! From King Garbage of the Garbage Dynasty. Stupid dog. Always bringing garbage into the house.
  • (A special Nowhere News report has started on tv.)
  • Nowhere Newsman: But the big story today... Million-dollar slab stolen from the Tomb of King Ramses. (the screen shows a picture of the slab Eustace just tossed)
  • Eustace: Eh? (goes to the open window and pulls the slab back inside) I'm rich!
  • (Eustace sets the slab on a stool. Courage inspects it nervously. Eustace is looking over the "Ads" section of the newspaper, plotting his next move.)
  • Muriel: But the man says it was stolen, Eustace. We must return it to its rightful place.
  • Eustace: He said a million-dollar slab, and that means I get a million dollars. And you know what a million dollars means.
  • (Courage is still looking at the slab. The image of Ramses magically vanishes. Courage panics.)
  • Courage: Ooh!
  • Eustace: That's right! New lawn chairs.
  • Courage: (babbles, then shapeshifts into a growling Courage Mummy; returns to normal and whines)
  • (Eustace reaches behind his chair and pulls out the phone. He dials a number. Courage yanks his ears and hops around in frustration.)
  • Eustace: Nowhere News? I want to put an ad in the paper. Yes, sir. You start running that ad right away.
  • (Courage shivers and shudders while Muriel dusts the slab with a feather duster. The moment Eustace hangs up, there is a knock at the door. Muriel answers it with Eustace close behind.)
  • Eustace: What's your offer?
  • Professor Frith: I am Professor Frith of the Institute of the Pharaoh. I've come to retrieve the slab.
  • Muriel: You see, Eustace, I told you it was stolen.
  • (Courage starts babbling again. He turns into a jungle explorer, then vanishes. He then turns into a sinking ship, then emerges from the puddle, shaking the water from his fur. Courage continues to babble with a shapeshifted slab in his hands. The slab disappears and he gets on his knees, begging for Eustace to give the professor the slab before something bad happens.)
  • Eustace: (laughs sarcastically) Ha ha ha! What's your offer?
  • Prof. Frith: Sir, the Institute for the Pharaoh is member-supported. But for every million-dollar donation, you'll receive this sporty tote bag with our thanks.
  • (He presents everyone with a yellow and orange tote bag and smiles. Eustace slams the door in his face.
  • Courage groans and hops around, tugging on his ears again.)
  • Muriel: Eustace, we really should give it back, you know.
  • Eustace: Uh-uh. Finders keepers.
  • (Eustace walks off. Later that night, a familiar, ominous fog is surrounding the farmhouse. Inside, Muriel is rocking in her rocking chair with Courage in her lap. Eustace is in his chair, holding the slab close to his chest, rocking back and forth and muttering to himself. Muriel looks concerned at his behavior.)
  • Eustace: Rich, rich, rich, rich, rich. Fly swatter, spark plugs, shovel handle, razor blade, light bulb for the attic.
  • (The doorknob starts to rattle. Courage howls with worry. Eustace gets up, holding the slab, and opens the door. Courage watches from the window. After looking around in the fog, Eustace finally sees their visitor: the ghost of King Ramses.)
  • King Ramses: Return the slab.
  • Eustace: What?
  • King Ramses: Return the slab or suffer my curse.
  • Eustace: What's your offer?!
  • King Ramses: This night, you will be visited by 3 plagues, each worse than the last. Return the slab.
  • Eustace: Hah! Nice try, Professor. (slams the door) Who's he kidding? I can see the zipper on that cheap dime store costume.
  • (As Eustace speaks, Courage looks at the slab in his arms. The picture of the water vanishes, causing Courage to howl again. There is a clap of thunder, and a single drop of water lands on the dog's nose.)
  • Courage: Huh?
  • (More water droplets come down. It is now raining inside of the house. Muriel and Eustace look up at this phenomenon.)
  • Eustace: Huh?
  • Muriel: Courage, did you leave the tub running?
  • (It rains harder.)
  • Courage: Oh! Eee! Ooh!
  • (Great torrents of water burst of from behind the pictures on the wall, the stuffed moose over the fireplace, and the grandfather clock. A large wave rushes down the stairs.The house is being flooded. Everyone screams and heads up the stairs as the water level rises. Eustace holds the slab over his head as he heads to the attic with Courage and Muriel. Courage opens the attic door, but water sweeps everyone inside of the room. The water continues to rise as household objects, like the computer, get swept away by the flood.
  • Courage and Muriel are trying to keep their heads above water as levels reach the ceiling.)
  • Muriel: Eustace? Hold on. Where's Eustace?
  • (Eustace is under water with a snorkel and flippers on. He still clutches the slab.
  • Muriel screams in fear, trying to tread water. Courage takes a deep breath and dives under, past Eustace and out of the attic. He makes his way down the stairs, through the living room and kitchen, and into the basement. In the center of the basement floor is a drain plug, much like one for a bathtub. Courage swims over to it and starts to pull. After a moment, he dislodges the plug, causing the water to go down the basement drain. Courage frantically swims away from the suction, which is pulling in all the furniture that was floating around in the house. All the water gets sucked down, and the furniture covers the drain hole.
  • Back outside, King Ramses is still standing in the front yard.)
  • King Ramses: Oh, come on.
  • (Back in the attic, there are still puddles and water dripping from the walls and ceiling. Muriel pants for air, but she and Eustace are otherwise unharmed.)
  • King Ramses: Return the slab.
  • Eustace: (shouting out the attic window) What's your offer?!
  • (King Ramses raises up his arms, starting the next plague. The picture of the phonograph on the slab vanishes. Muriel dumps water from her boot and Eustace wrings out his hat.)
  • Eustace: What's your--huh?
  • (Upbeat pop music starts to play. "The Man in Gauze" is being broadcast all over the area, causing Muriel and Eustace to scream and cover their ears. Courage exits the basement, also covering his ears. He reaches the attic to find his owners being audibly tortured. Eustace pulls large cotton balls out of his pockets and puts them in his ears to block out the music. )
  • Muriel: Courage, make it stop!
  • (Courage runs downstairs, and out of the back door, searching for the source of the noise. He checks the henhouse, but there is nothing inside. He checks under the water pump, but nothing is there either. He lifts up Eustace's truck, but there is nothing under there either. He runs past a rock, then comes back to it after noticing the music is louder behind the rock. He looks behind the rock and finds a phonograph. It is playing the song full volume on a record. Courage pulls a baseball bat from hammerspace and smashes the phonograph to pieces. The music stops after the first hit, but he gives it 4 more to be safe.)
  • Courage: Whew.
  • (Ramses is still in the front yard, waving his arms weirdly. Muriel and Eustace watch from the attic window.)
  • Ramses: Return the slab.
  • Muriel: Oh! Eustace, what are you waiting for? Till we're 6 feet under?
  • Eustace: (opens the attic window and yells out of it) All right, but a million's as low as I'll go.
  • (Ramses raises his arms again, poised to unleash the last plague. The image of the locust from the slab vanishes.
  • Courage makes his way back towards the house with his broken bat when he hears buzzing.)
  • Courage: (looks behind him; the swarm of locusts is back) Aah!
  • (Courage runs screaming into the house. The locusts pass the water pump, and leave behind its platform. They pass the henhouse, and leave behind its posts and ramp. The pass over the truck and leave behind the tires. The swarm encircles the house, ready to devour everything and everyone inside.)
  • King Ramses: Return the slab.
  • (Muriel runs screaming into the kitchen. Eustace and Courage are fighting over the slab; each tries to pull it towards himself. The locusts descend on the roof and start to eat it.)
  • King Ramses:Return the slab.
  • (Eustace is spinning Courage and the slab around and around, trying to make Courage let go. Courage clings to the slab for dear life.)
  • Eustace: Let go!
  • (The locusts have eaten the bedroom, leaving nothing behind.)
  • King Ramses:Return the slab.
  • (Muriel is in the kitchen, cooking up a frenzy. In a matter of seconds, she flattens some dough with her hands, rolls out more dough with a roller, fries a fish, stirs some soup, and seasons some meat. She returns to the roller and continues prepping the food, either trying to calm herself down, or knowing she's about to have her last meal.
  • In the living room, Courage and Eustace are still fighting over the slab, but they are interrupted by the locusts. They have breached the ceiling on the first floor and are slowly approaching the house's occupants.)
  • Courage: Aah!
  • Eustace: (lets go of the slab) Okay, okay, you can have it!
  • (Courage takes the slab and throws it out the window. It sails like a Frisbee across the yard and lands off screen. The locusts immediately stop and disperse. We can see the wreckage of the farmhouse. The locusts have eaten the entire top floor and about half of the lower floor. They have also eaten the top half of the windmill. Courage pants as he and Eustace look up at the sky where the locusts were. In the kitchen, a roast chicken is next to a bubbling pot on the stove. There is a bread basket and a layered pink cake on the counter. Muriel is at the table with her rolling pin, an unfrosted layer cake, and a frosted single layer cake in front of her. She sighs with relief and faints, falling face first into the frosted cake. Cut back to Courage in the living room.)
  • Courage: (falls to his knees) Whew! Oh...
  • Eustace: NOOO! I can't believe I did that. (rushes outside to where the slab landed, then picks it up and hugs it) It's mine! Eh?
  • (Eustace looks over and sees that King Ramses is now standing a foot away from him.)
  • Eustace: That's 3 plagues. You're outta ammo, mister. (snickers) And don't think you think you can come around here pushing no tote bags on us neither.
  • (Ramses doesn't move, but the fact that the buzzing starts back up indicates his displeasure with the situation. The locusts are back and approaching Eustace.)
  • Eustace: What's your offer?
  • King Ramses: Return the slab.
  • Eustace: (as the locusts descend upon him) Aaaaah!
  • (The following day, the sun rises over the still-destroyed house. Muriel is rocking with Courage in her chair. They are watching tv, and who else is being featured but Professor Frith.)
  • Prof. Frith: At last, the allegedly cursed slab has been returned to King Ramses' crypt, where it will remain buried in antiquity for all time. (the tv shows a picture of a pyramid in the desert)
  • Muriel: Oh, I wonder where Eustace is.
  • (Cut to the interior of Ramses' crypt. It is a room made of white marble, with gilded columns on each side. In the center is Ramses' sarcophagus, also made of marble. The slab that had been broken off has been returned to its original state, but with a significant change. The image of Ramses has been replaced with that of a screaming Eustace.)
  • Eustace: (echoing, from offscreen) Aah! What's your offer?